Quit your bitching

At the end of the days I, Nebuchadnezzar, lifted my eyes to heaven, and my reason returned to me, and I blessed the Most High, and praised and honored him who lives forever, for his dominion is an everlasting dominion, and his kingdom endures from generation to generation; all the inhabitants of the earth are accounted as nothing, and he does according to his will among the host of heaven and among the inhabitants of the earth; and none can stay his hand or say to him, “What have you done?” ‘ Daniel 4:34,35

That is probably one of my favorite chapters in the Old testament, why? Because here we see the pinnacle of pagan humanity, Nebuchadnezzar was the golden head in chapter 2, acknowledging that God is all-powerful and the we as humans are absolutely nothing in comparison. Now I will admit it took him going crazy for a time to realize that but still if the most powerful man on the earth can come to terms with that why can’t we? I mean seriously if we are so arrogant as to think just because things aren’t going our way we have the right to shake our fist at God and say, “How could this happen if you are a loving God? How is this just? Why would you allow this person to be put in authority over us?” The thing is we don’t have that right and the only thing that saying all those things is going to accomplish is more strife and hatred. That doesn’t mean bad things don’t happen, just that we cant change the past. We are told in Philippians to put the past behind us and press on towards Christ, how is complaining about things that have already happened pressing on towards Christ. In the next chapter Paul says not to worry about anything but to pray about it. How is it that we get ourself caught up into whatever the newest complaint bandwagon just as soon we hear it, while all the while there are many around us that haven’t heard or experienced the love of Christ. Ok well I’m starting to ramble on so I’ll wrap this up with this. We as Christians need to quit bitching about the state of the world and let Christ’s love flow through us to change it.

Stand Strong

Life is not always easy but what are we supposed to do when we supposed to do when things do not go the way we think they should? Well in James it says to ‘Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,’ Now why would we want to count it all joy seriously we are being bombarded by things big and small and we are supposed to be happy about it? Lets continue on to see if there is any method to this apparent madness in the next couple of verses we read ‘for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.’ Did that say lacking in nothing? So if we continue to be steadfast then we will eventually be perfect and complete, well I personally would love to do that but I also know that I have this thing called the flesh thats corrupt and clouds my resolve most of the time. How am I supposed to know that the decisions I make are the wise ones? ‘If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.’ So what it is saying is God will give us the wisdom to make the right decision if we only ask for it. Even it they just flippantly ask without really believing the it will happen? ‘But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.’ Wow ok so no doubting God in what He says will happen does, So we have to ask for wisdom in faith so that we can remain steadfast and joyful when the trials come because without them we can’t become complete. So what does it matter if we are joyful in since we have our whole lives to live? ‘Let the lowly brother boast in his exaltation, and the rich in his humiliation, because like a flower of the grass he will pass away. For the sun rises with its scorching heat and withers the grass; its flower falls, and its beauty perishes. So also will the rich man fade away in the midst of his pursuits.’ So since we fade away in the midst of our pursuits what does that say about American culture where one of our inalienable rights is the pursuit of happiness? Ok I digress thats a question for another day. But back to the verses at hand. Does that say that the lowly brother should boast in his exaltation? That sounds like common sense right? But wait we are talking about trials still since when would that be a trial? Is it a test to see if we will still boast in the Lord, or take the credit for ourselves and rely on our own understanding that is proven to pass away. Well thats enough ranting through the scripture for now. Just remember to stand strong in Christ power. ‘Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.’

Lip Service

In my last blog I ask the question, where is your heart? Which originally was supposed to lead into this next question, but the Lord had other plans, anyways ton to this weeks question. What is worship? According to Webster its ‘reverence offered a divine being or supernatural power also : an act of expressing such reverence.’ Wait a minute that said nothing about singing a bunch of emotionally charged songs, so that we stay awake during a twenty minute sermon, so who is wrong us or Webster? I remember back in junior high hearing someone say that we should check our hearts before singing the songs because they were prayers we were offering up to God, and so I became very aware of the words to some songs, and wouldn’t sing all the songs because I knew that they were not my heart’s desire and thought it was demeaning to the almighty, all-powerful Lord of all, that I just give Him lip service. An example the song ‘I want to know You’ in the chorus there is the line ‘I want to see Your face’ I didn’t want to see His face back then because if I saw His face that meant I was in heaven and there was too much I still wanted to do here on the earth. Yes I understand how petty and selfish that might have been, but I was younger, more naïve and wanted to experience life. The real irony of the whole situation was that I would get in trouble for not participating in the worship with all the other kids. So what are we teaching this generation about worship? We force them into an emotional high at camps and retreats so they will say all the right words at the right time and what ends up happening is they continue singing the songs to try and recapture the emotional drug, when really it is not about the emotion at all its about the devotion to God on high. It seems to me that all we are doing is making a generation of double-minded people who are blown to and fro by every emotional high that comes to sweep them up. So now that the problem has been laid out how do we as believers rectify it? How do we convey to the generations to come that it is not all about the emotional highs? How do we live our every breathing moment in full obsessive devotion to the Lord most high? I am not so arrogant as to say I have all the answers, because I am just as screwed up as the rest of the world. Thankfully it isn’t all about us its all Him and the Lord has provided His word and the holy Spirit to guide us if we will only listen. I just have this fear that in this post-modern emotionally driven society, that we are creating a generation that though they proclaim great things in the Lord’s name and yet on the last day hear the tragic words “Depart from me I never knew you.”

Where is you Heart?

Over the years I can say my heart has been tugged many different ways, a few times I’ve let it be consumed with a passion that really wasn’t healthy. But always in the background there was the knowledge that many years ago I had given my heart to God, and so even when I was at my most depraved moment I knew that my life was not my own, and that I shouldn’t be doing what I was doing. The question proposed in the beginning is ‘where is your heart?’ In truth our hearts should be completely consumed with the worship of God most high, and I’m not only talking about singing songs. To take a line from Casting Crowns our lifesong should sing to Him, every moment of our lives should be glorifying to God. And while some of us may say but ‘I don’t know how or you don’t know what I have done.’ That’s the beauty of it all no one knows how at the beginning , and as for what you have done God already knows what you done even down to your darkest thoughts. Here is the mind-boggling part God gave us His Word to show us how plus as you study it you realize He has promised to forgive us from everything and all we have to do believe and follow what He says. So really we don’t have an excuse because it’s nothing we do it’s all Him.

Matthew 12:34b

Tired

I’m tired. of just everything really. I’m ready for the summer to be here so I can just escape for awhile, not that I don’t care about all my friends here its just seems so monotonous and I’m tired of it all. I also have noticed that I have been becoming more critical later, like my patience with people, and may tactfulness which I normally try and maintain at least to some extent seems to have flown completely out the window. So whoever actually reads this please pray for me because I can’t do this on my own anymore.

Creep

*Warning Explicit Language in the Lyrics*

When you were here before
Couldnt look you in the eye
Youre just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
Youre so fuckin special

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.

I dont care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When Im not around
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.

Shes running out again,
Shes running out
Shes run run run running out…

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special…

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo,
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.
I dont belong here.
~Radiohead

So I know i am not the status-quo male, Im insecure, awkward, quiet, sarcastic, have no inclination toward feats of strength, dont have any of the attributes assoicated with classic masculine beauty, and sometimes my ineptitude at all things social amazes even me. On top of that I have little to no ambition, I have been saying I wanna go do the same thing since I got out of high school but my heart truely is no longer in it. What I feel I’m being called to now is still requiring school which I cant seem to focus on for more than three weeks at a time which really doesnt help me since a semester is normally around fourteen weeks. Yet with all those shortcomings I still have an amazing group of friends that still stick with me through thick and thin. How the hell does that happen?

The only answer that really makes any sense to me is God. He takes all those weaknesses and uses them to make me rely on Him all the more. Then when I rely on Him, He amazing me all the more by the glorious work of His hands. So even though I have to wait until I am in His presence on the new earth for the perfect  body and soul, I do know I will get it. Until that day comes though Iwill continue to rely on the Lord. and hopefully not let pride get in the way too much.

Disarray

In all the swirling disarray things finally start to focus and still I wonder why fear constricts my voice from what it wants to say. As I regroup from a stagnant muck, a curiosity is revived and so now the question placed at my feet. Will I again let it fester and fade? or pull from the inner strength bestowed from on high, and see fruition or let it finally die. The answers I do not yet know the focus still unclear, for while the disarray is still beheld, I hope its end is near

Only Hope

There’s a song that’s inside of my soul
It’s the one that I’ve tried to write
Over and over again
I’m awake and in the infinite cold
But You sing to me over and over and
Over again

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands
And pray to be only Yours
I pray to be only Yours
I know now You’re my only hope

Sing to me of the song of the stars
Of Your galaxy dancing and laughing
And laughing again
When it feels like my dreams are so far
Sing to me of the plans that You have
For me over again

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands
And pray to be only Yours
I pray to be only Yours
I know now You’re my only hope

I give You my apathy
I’m giving You all of me
I want Your symphony
Singing in all that I am
At the top of my lungs I’m giving it back

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands
And pray to be only Yours
I pray to be only Yours
I know now You’re my only hope

~Switchfoot

Ok so this song became somewhat popular after Walk to Remember came out and Mandy Moore sang it. But have you ever stopped and looked at the lyrics? Lately I have been discouraged by the shallowness of the culture surrounding me which I’ll be the first to admit being guilty of participating in. But what do we do most of the time sit around trying to entertain ourselves,  getting all ramped up to travel all around the world to share with people groups the love of Christ. We are losing sight of a large people group sitting right at our doorstep; nieghbors relatives, classmates, coworkers. If we can’t even reach out and show Christ love to those directly around us what makes us think we have any hope in reaching people who we don’t know or really care about. Yes the Lord can give you a longing to reach a people group but how can you feel real emotion about someone without a relationship. If Christ is our only hope then why are we so scared to share Him with the ones we care about? or is that we just want our passports full.

Change

Now that the election is over everyone knows the next 4 years will be bringing change to the country whether for the good or bad time will tell, but for Christians what does it mean? Does it mean we should be fearful of whats to come, or should we join together and try and overthrow this leader that we may consider amoral. Most likely what will happen is we will go along with are complacent lives griping because things didnt go the way we wanted them to. As Christians we are to focus on the goal and bring as many as we can with us. And guess what? nothing can stop, history testifies to the fact that when the church is suppressed it blows up, we have allowed ourselves to be lulled into complacency, its time to let God’s love pour through us on to the lost souls of this world. ok i think i’m done now

Dad Update

First I wanna say thanks for all the prayer, radiation began last thursday and that will continue every weekday until sometime in December. The family is doing well through this so far, thankfully yeah I think that is about it that I know of.